Faith, Family and Friends

So many things have happened in the past year that I don't know how to respond to some of them.  I have seen the best and worst in people in my life.  I have also seen the best in people in some of the worst tragic events.  One of these events was the Boston Marathon.  As a runner, I get excited for people who run these races and train so hard.  I understand what they are going through, how hard those final few miles are and what it is like to cross the finish line.  The party at the end of the race is a blast.  Hundreds perhaps thousands (at the BolderBoulder) of people are at the finish line cheering you on. They don't even know you or where you are from or how hard you trained to get there.  Even though some of those runners didn't get to cross the finish line yesterday, they were still greeted with such kindness and love by those in Boston.  Strangers helping strangers, runners, after 26 miles, kept running to give blood, military personal who ran in full fatigues moving barriers to get to the wounded.  It makes me believe in the goodness of people and it still exists. 

After yesterday's events, it makes my problems seem so small but still in the forefront of my mind.  Once I left my last job, after all the horrible things that happened, I tried to remain optimistic and that something will come soon through.  After several interviews and many rejections, I am remaining optimistic that something will happen and I will be in a job where my talents are appreciated and I can be myself.  I have been told that my resume is impressive, I have an amazing background and that I will be valuable to my future employer.  I have learned that if it has assistant or associate in the title, I am told right away I am too overqualified and I should be running the department.  I am still hopeful that the right position will come through soon and I can put this all behind me. 

Through all of this, I have realized the three most important things to me in my life.  They have become the foundation in my life and the things that have seen me through some of the best times but also the worst times of my life.  Without these things, I would not be myself. 

My faith is something that will never waiver, no matter what I am going through in this earthly life.  I am reading through the Book of Job in the Old Testament.  He was tested and put through strife from God.  He questioned Him and but still asked for strength.  Job asked God why He was putting him through it.  God states that those that are faithful and put their trust in Him will be taken care of and loved.  God doesn't put you through anything you can't handle and He must think I am pretty strong.  Through all of this, however, I am learning patience. I am learning what God has planned for me and He will reveal it to me when it is time.  All I know is that I am meant to be here, this is my home now. 

For those who know me, they know that nothing is more important to me than my family.  Family is who taught you to be who you are.  They are the group of people that no matter what happens to you in life, they are there.  My mother reminds me of this constantly.  She is my best friend and I am so thankful to be her daughter.  She tells me "We are always here. We are family".  I know they will always be there and I know they will always love me no matter what.  They are proud of me and standing up for who I am and what I believe in.  This family also includes my love who has been a constant rock in my life for the past three years and I couldn't imagine life without him in it.  My family is all over the country but somehow we manage to stay close and keep in touch always.  Through emails, phone calls and the occasional letter (which I love getting letters in the mail by the way), we manage to keep that family bond strong and growing. 

I don't have a ton of friends in my life.  I don't need a ton. I have those really close friends that I have known for years, who have known me through all of my journeys.  There are those I have only had for a few years but have found a place in my heart and will stay there.  I have lost friends because we have taken a different road on our journey.  They were meant to be there for a short time for some reason but they are not meant to be in my life any longer.  I have accepted that and moved on.  If they hurt me, I forgave them.  But those who are closest to me know how much they mean to me and how much I am thankful to have them.  They help me remember who I am and help me to be stronger and laugh often! 

These three things in my life create a beautiful foundation in my life and keep me going.  Without one of these three things, my life would feel empty of sorts.  This is why I am thankful for all of these and those that are a part of my life. 

365 Days of Thanks..Day 45

Day 45: I am thankful for visits from my mom!

My mom lives back in my home state of Wisconsin.  It is too far away and wish she (and the rest of my family) was closer.  I treasure the times when I get to see her and I got to spend the past week with her.  The visits sometimes seem too far apart but I am thankful for the time we have together. 

365 Days of Thanks...Day 44

Day 44:  I am thankful for almost 70 degree weather in March!

A few weeks ago I started training for my first race.  This year, it will be the BolderBoulder.  In past years, I have done a Colfax Marathon race but I have decided to focus on the BolderBoulder this year.  I am excited that today is going to be nice and warm so I can take my training out to the sidewalk instead of a treadmill!! 


(I realize that I haven't done a thanks everyday but I will be going till I hit 365!)

Oh what a headache!

I just love this quote-
I am waiting to celebrate!

I realized yesterday that I haven't written in quite some time.  Part of it is that my thoughts are a little cloudy, the other part is that I have been in a weird place. 


I have had this cold for about two weeks now.  It started with some mild stuffiness and the normal sneezing/coughing of a cold.  Well, the stuffiness and other typical cold stuff has subsided but the cough and the headaches are still around.  I wake up daily with them and end up in some coughing fits.  The other day I coughed so bad, I gave myself a migraine.  I am feeling better today, but the headache is still lingering.

I have had a hard week this week.  I don't know why and I am trying to remind myself that everything is going to be okay.  My heart knows that it will be alright but my head needs to do a little catch up.  Mondays are always hard.  My love goes off to work in the morning and I am alone in my apartment searching for things on my computer.  It gets old really quick.  I do have my runs, bike rides, and yoga to keep me somewhat sane, but I miss talking to people everyday.  I see the ladies in the leasing office (they are an awesome bunch) or other people around the complex daily.  But I miss getting up and going somewhere and having a purpose.  I don't ever want to go back to the place I was at in my last job, that was just awful.  I have put that behind me and all those people behind me.  I didn't realize just how petty and self-centered the whole place was until I left. 

 

I am a firm believer that everything in life happens for a reason. I know that the path that I am on is the right path and I am in the right place for my life.  I know I am meant to stay here, not only for my love but for some other reason.  I may not know the reason right now or I might never know, but I know in my heart I am in the right place. 

I have a set of amazing parents.  Both of which I talked to yesterday crying and upset over certain things.  They have been my biggest cheerleaders and greatest supports through everything I have done in life.  I am so proud to call them my parents.  I miss them daily.  I hope one day I can do something for them like they have done so much for me.

If God puts you in it, He will get you through it.  I just have to remember this and remember that God is always there for me too. I know one day all this will be put behind me.  My love and I are growing stronger together through all of this.  If we can make it through this, we can make it through anything! 

Just keep praying and God will put me in the right place at the right time.  Just have to keep the faith!! 

Love above all and above all Love!!

365 Days of Thanks..Day 43

Day 43: I am thankful for my new little stove. 

My parents were very generous with me for my birthday this year (hey, I'm turning 30 in four days!).  They bought me a cute little stove that is a space heater type of thing so no real flames.  I have wanted one forever and it helps with the heating bills and it is cute in my little home.  I am thankful for it and my munchkin Audrey loves it too! :) 

Parenting

My mind has been thinking a lot about what kind of parent I will be one day.  I know that I will enjoy the experience but what kind will I be is something I wonder.

My brother and I grew up with an amazing set of parents.  I didn't realize until I was an adult how much they sacrificed for us.  As kids, we are blind to this.  We think that these two people are there to give us whatever we wanted but that is not their purpose.  My parents sent us to the best schools, took us on amazing journeys and spent as much time with us as they could.  My mom worked nights but she was still at every sporting event I participated in.  Dad was too, but most of the time he was there with his EMT kit too!  They supported my brother through his engineering awesomeness (I don't know what else to call it) and me when I said I wanted to go to Grad school.  Some of my best memories are in our old house on Lilac Lane.  When it snowed, dad would pull out the snow blower and my brother and I would be out there to help (well, not most of the time, but we were out there playing).  My brother and I used to draw roads with chalk on the driveway and ride our bikes up and down it all day.  We played kickball in the front yard and baseball in the backyard with the family (including my grandparents).  I loved carving pumpkins on the family room floor on newspapers.  Mine was not as precise as my brothers, but I am the artist in the family.  My brother and I never got everything we asked for and I am thankful for that.  I see too many children today being spoiled by being given everything.  I am scared of one day when they grow and they hit a hard dose of reality.  I know that I do not want to do that one day.  Some of my most precious memories are the times we had together, not the things.  Standing on a glacier in Glacier National Park in the middle of summer watching our tour guide test to make sure we wouldn't fall through.  Driving a Wrangler on the wrong side of the road in St. Thomas, even though I became extremely sunburned on that trip.  Holding flowers at the top of the Space Needle or the first time I was at the top of the Empire State Building.  One of my favorite trips was to the Grand Canyon. It is still my favorite place today.  When I lived in Arizona in 2006, my brother came to visit me.  We took a photograph at the Hopi Point sign.  When I was home next, I found a photo at the exact same spot when we were kids.  It made me smile. 

These two people created us out of love that they have for each other.  They love each other so much they decided to bring another life into this world and share that love.  To me, this is some of the most amazing love I could ever think of.  Growing up under my parents wings, they taught me so many things.  They taught me to truly be who I am, be tough, be strong, be kind, be in awe, love your life, love what you do and don't let anyone tell you that you aren't good enough. 

My parents are still these amazing creatures.  I have been through lots of ups and downs in the past decade of my life.  They have stood by me through it all.  They have reminded me to be that strong person that they raised with all those values and all the hard work they taught us to do.  I am proud of the values that they have passed on to both of us. 

I know right now I don't know the type of parent I will be.  My mom told me once that she hopes that I have a daughter one day just like me.  She meant it for the good and the bad.  My mom and I have grown very close over the years and I pray that one day I will have the relationship with my daughter.  This is why one day, I hope to be like my mother to my children, either a son or daughter or both.  We had our differences growing up but she is part of who I am. 

One day I hope, God willing, I will be able to pass on all these amazing traits and values to my children.  I hope I raise God fearing children who don't want things but crave memories.  I pray for children who respect their parents and those in their lives.  I want to be a kind and generous mother but also a shoulder they can cry on no matter what, even if they go to a party and get drunk at sixteen.  I look forward to the young years as they learn about the world around them and as they get older and learn all the amazing things that are out there for them to experience. 

I may not know what kind of parent I will be one day, but I have two amazing examples to model after.  No parent is perfect but mine were (and still are) pretty awesome.  I pray one day I can be like them and raise two (or more) awesome kids like they raised. :) 

It all starts with just a little bit of love. 

365 Days of Thanks...Day 42

Day 42: I am thankful for this gluten-free pizza. 

Almost a year ago, I was diagnosed with gluten intolerance.  It has been a hard road and I am constantly searching for foods which are close to "normal" food.  My mother sent me some white bread flour mix which I made a pizza crust with.  This was the first time I ever made it but it was so tasty. 

I covered it with pizza sauce, mozzarella and parmesan cheese, red peppers, pepperoni, black olives, tomatoes and mushrooms.  It was delicious.  Here is the recipe if anyone is interested:

1 package Toro Celiac Safe White Bread Mix
1 1/3 cup lukewarm water
1/2 tsp salt
1 packet "active dry" yeast
2 tbsp. oil

Preperation
1. Preheat oven to 450 F
2. Mix dry ingredients and add lukewarm water.  Knead to make a dough
3. Roll out dough and leave to rise in warm place for appx. 20 minutes
4. Top as desired with cheese and other pizza toppings
5. Bake on bottom shelf of oven at 450 F for appx. 15 minutes.