Dreams and Reflections

So I haven't written in some time.  Things have been quite nutty and busy in my life! But I would rather be busy than bored!

I have been having some odd dreams lately.  A couple nights ago I had a dream we were at my 20th High School reunion and we had a child that was a vampire.  Don't know what that means.  But last night's dream was one of oddness.  It was a reflection on the past year but not in flashbacks but in pie charts and bar graphs.  These also were not on a computer or anything like that but floating freely around me.  I couldn't tell what some of these charts were but some were purely pop culture asking favorite movie, song, or event throughout the year.  Other's were on the state of our country and all the things that changed in 2013.  It was just very odd.

But upon waking up and reflecting on what the dream was showing me, I look back on this crazy crazy year.  For some reason this year was not like the rest but seemed strange and odd at points.  I am very thankful for the many things that have happened to me this year, including a new job sharing the history of an amazing woman.  She saw her our struggles, and feel like her and I could have been friends if we ever met!

I am looking forward to 2014.  I feel as if this year needs to be put in the history books and not be reflected on often.  There were negatives along the way, and one of my goals for 2014 is to try to stay on the positive side of things.  Too many times I was drawn into a world of negativity by those around me and it takes too much energy to stay in that world.  I am an optimist at heart and plan to stay in that world next year.

Next year will also be a year of adventures.  My love and I are planning a trip to Paris, probably in June.  It will be my first trip to Europe and can't believe it is actually happening.  I am starting to train for a half marathon again that I will be running with a coworker.  I haven't run a half in over a year so this will be an interesting adventure!  Professionally, things are completely changing at the museum and it will be a huge year.  I am working on this huge military appreciation day in July and we are working with so many other cultural institutions.

I am looking forward to moving forward in 2014 and putting this strange year behind me.  Here is to a Happy New Year and the greatest adventures in 2014!!!

Here is to Love for all in the new year!!

Reflections on 9/11

All of us who were alive that day, remember exactly where we were and what we were doing.  It is a day that can never be forgotten. I was just a freshman in college walking to class.  I heard people talking about the world trade center being bombed.  They weren't serious so I thought it was a new movie or something.  When I got to class, the teacher wasn't there yet so a few of us went to look for a tv or radio.  We found one and brought it back but by that time the teacher arrived and told us to go back to our dorms and turn on our tvs.  I got back to see the first tower fall. 

We were glued to our tvs all day.  My roommate found out her aunt was on the plane that hit the second tower.  I would later find out that my pastor from back home was on the other side of the pentagon.  Towards the middle of the afternoon, our RA made us leave our rooms to go down to the cafeteria.  We had been watching the news all day, doing nothing else.  I was talking on AIM but otherwise, my eyes were glued to the tv.  When we got to the cafeteria, I never heard something so quiet.  No talking, no laughing, nothing.  We went to bed that night wondering what the hell just happened. 

Years have gone by but I will never forget that day.  The town my parents live in has a silent parade every year.  The emergency vehicles drive with their lights on but no sirens, to remember those we lost.  A small ceremony is held afterward.  I have seen it once and it is a moving experience.  I have done something else to remember the day.  For four years now, we go to Red Rocks in Morrison, CO to participate in the 9/11 stair climb.  It has become an amazing remembrance of all those that were lost that day.  It is a physical challenge, 110 stories, the height of the World Trade Center.  Even though I am tired at the end, it is nothing like the challenge the men and women on 9/11 went through. 

It is a day that will forever stick in my mind, like a lot of people in this world.  But we must not forget other major days in our history: Pearl Harbor, Oklahoma City, and last year's attack on Benghazi.  We need to remember those lost that day as well. 

We should never forget yet always remember that day.  But as well, remember September 12th, when we came together, when we stood up to those who tried to hurt us, when we were true Americans!

God Bless America!!

The adventures of the employed!

For almost nine months, I was searching for a new job in my field and after a long search, I found one.  I work at an amazing museum where people from all over the world flock just to see it.  It is the home of an absolutely splendid woman who worked hard to change the world through her wealth and social standing.  She was called the "Heroine of the Titanic" but felt as if she was only doing her duty, she fought for women's rights, worked with Rockefeller to improve rights of miner's after the Ludlow Massacre, allowed her servants to learn right along with her, and so much more in Denver and the world.  This woman is Margaret Tobin Brown and she is an amazing woman to have as a boss!

Yes, I know, she has been long gone for many years but educating those who admire her wonder and gumption is a great honor.  I have been at the museum for over two months now (sorry it has taken so long to write again) and I have learned so much about her and I am far from a feminist but she is a woman to be admired. 

As with any new job, there is always a time when you are learning so much and then all of a sudden you know the programs and the beginning of it all and you can start putting on your own touch.  I am at the moment but I have also learned what to share and what not to share.  It has been a great learning experience and I am looking forward to learning more about this amazing woman and her legacy in the world. 

I have realized over all this time who has truly been there for me and who was a spark in my life and who has continued to burn as a friend in my life.  It is interesting in the times of trouble who stays out of your life but the moment something great happens they all come running back.  But I have learned some lessons from Margaret and it is to stand up for what I believe in and what really matters in life. 

I am excited about this adventure and I can't wait to see where this employment journey takes me. 

The Wonder

Colorado has become so beautiful but very warm lately.  I was thrilled over the weekend that I could put my plants out on the patio and the sun shower over them.  I love having my patio garden and look forward to a real garden at my house one day.  The other thing I love about the warmer weather is that I can get out to run. 

Now, I am not the fastest runner but I still get out there and hit the pavement. Especially when I have two races coming up in the next two weeks.  There is a trail by my apartment complex that I enjoy going out on going in different directions.  It is nice to get out and about during the day and get my mind off of things.  It is my chance to escape and just focus on each step.  Granted, yes, I do have my iPod playing some high beat songs to keep me going but without it I would feel weird running. 

While I am out running, I think about some things and one of those things is The Wonder.  As children, we are amazed by so many things and enjoy the wonder of them all.  I think about this as I run since I pass so many amazing things. I run over several bridges that go back and forth over the creek.  I love listening to the water flow over the rocks and sometimes I stop in the middle of the bridge to watch and listen.  I enjoy seeing birds flying overhead and chirping as they head off to their next destination.  I love the smell of the air and the grass (especially after it is just cut).  These are some of the things I think of as I run.  I try to think about what it would be like as a child again seeing all these things.

Children have such a sense of things that we lose as we get older.  But with everything I have been going through, it is nice to try and think of the wonder again.  The little things in my house too help with the wonder.  My cat relaxing on the recliner (which is her chair) or her going after a small bug I can't see. The smell of coffee brewing in the morning or the sun pouring through the window.  I am trying to remember the wonder to help me through some of the tough times and keep the optimistic attitude I have always had. 

I am still the firm believer in love in all things too.  The wonder to me is another sign of love...

Faith, Family and Friends

So many things have happened in the past year that I don't know how to respond to some of them.  I have seen the best and worst in people in my life.  I have also seen the best in people in some of the worst tragic events.  One of these events was the Boston Marathon.  As a runner, I get excited for people who run these races and train so hard.  I understand what they are going through, how hard those final few miles are and what it is like to cross the finish line.  The party at the end of the race is a blast.  Hundreds perhaps thousands (at the BolderBoulder) of people are at the finish line cheering you on. They don't even know you or where you are from or how hard you trained to get there.  Even though some of those runners didn't get to cross the finish line yesterday, they were still greeted with such kindness and love by those in Boston.  Strangers helping strangers, runners, after 26 miles, kept running to give blood, military personal who ran in full fatigues moving barriers to get to the wounded.  It makes me believe in the goodness of people and it still exists. 

After yesterday's events, it makes my problems seem so small but still in the forefront of my mind.  Once I left my last job, after all the horrible things that happened, I tried to remain optimistic and that something will come soon through.  After several interviews and many rejections, I am remaining optimistic that something will happen and I will be in a job where my talents are appreciated and I can be myself.  I have been told that my resume is impressive, I have an amazing background and that I will be valuable to my future employer.  I have learned that if it has assistant or associate in the title, I am told right away I am too overqualified and I should be running the department.  I am still hopeful that the right position will come through soon and I can put this all behind me. 

Through all of this, I have realized the three most important things to me in my life.  They have become the foundation in my life and the things that have seen me through some of the best times but also the worst times of my life.  Without these things, I would not be myself. 

My faith is something that will never waiver, no matter what I am going through in this earthly life.  I am reading through the Book of Job in the Old Testament.  He was tested and put through strife from God.  He questioned Him and but still asked for strength.  Job asked God why He was putting him through it.  God states that those that are faithful and put their trust in Him will be taken care of and loved.  God doesn't put you through anything you can't handle and He must think I am pretty strong.  Through all of this, however, I am learning patience. I am learning what God has planned for me and He will reveal it to me when it is time.  All I know is that I am meant to be here, this is my home now. 

For those who know me, they know that nothing is more important to me than my family.  Family is who taught you to be who you are.  They are the group of people that no matter what happens to you in life, they are there.  My mother reminds me of this constantly.  She is my best friend and I am so thankful to be her daughter.  She tells me "We are always here. We are family".  I know they will always be there and I know they will always love me no matter what.  They are proud of me and standing up for who I am and what I believe in.  This family also includes my love who has been a constant rock in my life for the past three years and I couldn't imagine life without him in it.  My family is all over the country but somehow we manage to stay close and keep in touch always.  Through emails, phone calls and the occasional letter (which I love getting letters in the mail by the way), we manage to keep that family bond strong and growing. 

I don't have a ton of friends in my life.  I don't need a ton. I have those really close friends that I have known for years, who have known me through all of my journeys.  There are those I have only had for a few years but have found a place in my heart and will stay there.  I have lost friends because we have taken a different road on our journey.  They were meant to be there for a short time for some reason but they are not meant to be in my life any longer.  I have accepted that and moved on.  If they hurt me, I forgave them.  But those who are closest to me know how much they mean to me and how much I am thankful to have them.  They help me remember who I am and help me to be stronger and laugh often! 

These three things in my life create a beautiful foundation in my life and keep me going.  Without one of these three things, my life would feel empty of sorts.  This is why I am thankful for all of these and those that are a part of my life. 

365 Days of Thanks..Day 45

Day 45: I am thankful for visits from my mom!

My mom lives back in my home state of Wisconsin.  It is too far away and wish she (and the rest of my family) was closer.  I treasure the times when I get to see her and I got to spend the past week with her.  The visits sometimes seem too far apart but I am thankful for the time we have together. 

365 Days of Thanks...Day 44

Day 44:  I am thankful for almost 70 degree weather in March!

A few weeks ago I started training for my first race.  This year, it will be the BolderBoulder.  In past years, I have done a Colfax Marathon race but I have decided to focus on the BolderBoulder this year.  I am excited that today is going to be nice and warm so I can take my training out to the sidewalk instead of a treadmill!! 


(I realize that I haven't done a thanks everyday but I will be going till I hit 365!)

Oh what a headache!

I just love this quote-
I am waiting to celebrate!

I realized yesterday that I haven't written in quite some time.  Part of it is that my thoughts are a little cloudy, the other part is that I have been in a weird place. 


I have had this cold for about two weeks now.  It started with some mild stuffiness and the normal sneezing/coughing of a cold.  Well, the stuffiness and other typical cold stuff has subsided but the cough and the headaches are still around.  I wake up daily with them and end up in some coughing fits.  The other day I coughed so bad, I gave myself a migraine.  I am feeling better today, but the headache is still lingering.

I have had a hard week this week.  I don't know why and I am trying to remind myself that everything is going to be okay.  My heart knows that it will be alright but my head needs to do a little catch up.  Mondays are always hard.  My love goes off to work in the morning and I am alone in my apartment searching for things on my computer.  It gets old really quick.  I do have my runs, bike rides, and yoga to keep me somewhat sane, but I miss talking to people everyday.  I see the ladies in the leasing office (they are an awesome bunch) or other people around the complex daily.  But I miss getting up and going somewhere and having a purpose.  I don't ever want to go back to the place I was at in my last job, that was just awful.  I have put that behind me and all those people behind me.  I didn't realize just how petty and self-centered the whole place was until I left. 

 

I am a firm believer that everything in life happens for a reason. I know that the path that I am on is the right path and I am in the right place for my life.  I know I am meant to stay here, not only for my love but for some other reason.  I may not know the reason right now or I might never know, but I know in my heart I am in the right place. 

I have a set of amazing parents.  Both of which I talked to yesterday crying and upset over certain things.  They have been my biggest cheerleaders and greatest supports through everything I have done in life.  I am so proud to call them my parents.  I miss them daily.  I hope one day I can do something for them like they have done so much for me.

If God puts you in it, He will get you through it.  I just have to remember this and remember that God is always there for me too. I know one day all this will be put behind me.  My love and I are growing stronger together through all of this.  If we can make it through this, we can make it through anything! 

Just keep praying and God will put me in the right place at the right time.  Just have to keep the faith!! 

Love above all and above all Love!!

365 Days of Thanks..Day 43

Day 43: I am thankful for my new little stove. 

My parents were very generous with me for my birthday this year (hey, I'm turning 30 in four days!).  They bought me a cute little stove that is a space heater type of thing so no real flames.  I have wanted one forever and it helps with the heating bills and it is cute in my little home.  I am thankful for it and my munchkin Audrey loves it too! :) 

Parenting

My mind has been thinking a lot about what kind of parent I will be one day.  I know that I will enjoy the experience but what kind will I be is something I wonder.

My brother and I grew up with an amazing set of parents.  I didn't realize until I was an adult how much they sacrificed for us.  As kids, we are blind to this.  We think that these two people are there to give us whatever we wanted but that is not their purpose.  My parents sent us to the best schools, took us on amazing journeys and spent as much time with us as they could.  My mom worked nights but she was still at every sporting event I participated in.  Dad was too, but most of the time he was there with his EMT kit too!  They supported my brother through his engineering awesomeness (I don't know what else to call it) and me when I said I wanted to go to Grad school.  Some of my best memories are in our old house on Lilac Lane.  When it snowed, dad would pull out the snow blower and my brother and I would be out there to help (well, not most of the time, but we were out there playing).  My brother and I used to draw roads with chalk on the driveway and ride our bikes up and down it all day.  We played kickball in the front yard and baseball in the backyard with the family (including my grandparents).  I loved carving pumpkins on the family room floor on newspapers.  Mine was not as precise as my brothers, but I am the artist in the family.  My brother and I never got everything we asked for and I am thankful for that.  I see too many children today being spoiled by being given everything.  I am scared of one day when they grow and they hit a hard dose of reality.  I know that I do not want to do that one day.  Some of my most precious memories are the times we had together, not the things.  Standing on a glacier in Glacier National Park in the middle of summer watching our tour guide test to make sure we wouldn't fall through.  Driving a Wrangler on the wrong side of the road in St. Thomas, even though I became extremely sunburned on that trip.  Holding flowers at the top of the Space Needle or the first time I was at the top of the Empire State Building.  One of my favorite trips was to the Grand Canyon. It is still my favorite place today.  When I lived in Arizona in 2006, my brother came to visit me.  We took a photograph at the Hopi Point sign.  When I was home next, I found a photo at the exact same spot when we were kids.  It made me smile. 

These two people created us out of love that they have for each other.  They love each other so much they decided to bring another life into this world and share that love.  To me, this is some of the most amazing love I could ever think of.  Growing up under my parents wings, they taught me so many things.  They taught me to truly be who I am, be tough, be strong, be kind, be in awe, love your life, love what you do and don't let anyone tell you that you aren't good enough. 

My parents are still these amazing creatures.  I have been through lots of ups and downs in the past decade of my life.  They have stood by me through it all.  They have reminded me to be that strong person that they raised with all those values and all the hard work they taught us to do.  I am proud of the values that they have passed on to both of us. 

I know right now I don't know the type of parent I will be.  My mom told me once that she hopes that I have a daughter one day just like me.  She meant it for the good and the bad.  My mom and I have grown very close over the years and I pray that one day I will have the relationship with my daughter.  This is why one day, I hope to be like my mother to my children, either a son or daughter or both.  We had our differences growing up but she is part of who I am. 

One day I hope, God willing, I will be able to pass on all these amazing traits and values to my children.  I hope I raise God fearing children who don't want things but crave memories.  I pray for children who respect their parents and those in their lives.  I want to be a kind and generous mother but also a shoulder they can cry on no matter what, even if they go to a party and get drunk at sixteen.  I look forward to the young years as they learn about the world around them and as they get older and learn all the amazing things that are out there for them to experience. 

I may not know what kind of parent I will be one day, but I have two amazing examples to model after.  No parent is perfect but mine were (and still are) pretty awesome.  I pray one day I can be like them and raise two (or more) awesome kids like they raised. :) 

It all starts with just a little bit of love. 

365 Days of Thanks...Day 42

Day 42: I am thankful for this gluten-free pizza. 

Almost a year ago, I was diagnosed with gluten intolerance.  It has been a hard road and I am constantly searching for foods which are close to "normal" food.  My mother sent me some white bread flour mix which I made a pizza crust with.  This was the first time I ever made it but it was so tasty. 

I covered it with pizza sauce, mozzarella and parmesan cheese, red peppers, pepperoni, black olives, tomatoes and mushrooms.  It was delicious.  Here is the recipe if anyone is interested:

1 package Toro Celiac Safe White Bread Mix
1 1/3 cup lukewarm water
1/2 tsp salt
1 packet "active dry" yeast
2 tbsp. oil

Preperation
1. Preheat oven to 450 F
2. Mix dry ingredients and add lukewarm water.  Knead to make a dough
3. Roll out dough and leave to rise in warm place for appx. 20 minutes
4. Top as desired with cheese and other pizza toppings
5. Bake on bottom shelf of oven at 450 F for appx. 15 minutes.

 

365 Day of Thanks..Day 41

Day 41: I am thankful for a walk in the snow.

We are getting some light flurries right now in Lakewood.  Snow always makes me feel just a bit better.  I walked to my mailbox to check my mail and the snow was the perfect flurries!  The mail wasn't ready yet so I will be taking another walk there later.  I do love the snow!

Put a ring on it

I was chatting with a friend last night who currently lives in Montana.  She is coming back to town next week for a job here.  I applied for a job in the same building and I am hoping that I get it.  If I do, we chatted about having lunch outside at the café they have there and checking out guys for her.  She made a comment on how they would be all looking at me, which I disagree with!   So I told her that I would wear a fake ring so they would know I am off limits. 

I am off limits.  I have been with the same amazing man for over three years and it has been an amazing journey.   I don't know where our journey is headed but I am looking forward to it.  Every so often I wear a fake ring because I don't enjoy being hit on.  I have been hit on by men and women, had my ass grabbed, heard some of the corniest pick up lines and been on the receiving end of some of the most awkward winks.  It is just another reason I wear the fake ring.  I realize that I am not the only gal out there who does this. 

These thoughts came into my brain because I have become a master of looking for the ring on the finger.  In my single days, I could pick out a married guy over a single one any day.  My friend mentioned I should teach a class or write a book or something.  But then I got to thinking, some women put so much into the engagement ring or wedding band that they seem to lose all meaning.  My future engagement ring belonged to my great-grandmother and it has an interesting story behind it.  It is not big.  It is not flashy.  It is sentimental.  When I receive it one day, it will mean more to me then a huge flashy chunk of jewelry.  I have seen women and have worked with others who think their ring defines them and makes them better then others.  It's not about the ring, it is a symbol of love and the life built together.  It also isn't about the wedding it is about the marriage. 

I guess my point is that people put too much emphasis on material things.  I have items that are precious to me and I would never want to lose.  Most of these are family heirlooms or memories from trips and journeys I have been on.  There are other things, however, that are just things.  I never wanted the huge house, the fanciest car or the biggest diamonds.  I am more into the memories and the people that are in my life.  The snapshots that show the journey I have been on, the people who have been there with me and the direction I am heading in the future. 

I always say it's all about the love! <3

365 Days of Thanks...Day 40

Day 40: I am thankful for warm weather in February.

I am a huge fan of snow but getting a couple days of warm weather in the middle of winter is always nice! I was able to run outside and enjoy a nice walk today.  I am looking forward to some snow this weekend but I will enjoy the warm weather while it is here!

For every season....

Lately, I have been doing a lot of thinking about the reason for certain things.  I am firm believer that everything happens for a reason, even the smallest littlest things that you think may not have an effect on your future.  I have looked at the past decade of my life and I have done some amazing things and each one of them had a reason.

I have lived in a eight different states in my life.  Each one had a different impact on my life and the direction it has gone in.  I have lived places that I never thought I would and have done things that I look back and am thankful I have had them.  There are experiences that when I look back in my old age, I can say "I had an amazing life". 

I have lived in a converted chicken coop for six months in Northern Arizona with no internet and barely any cable channels.  I explored every weekend and loved every minute of it.  I have seen things there and learned things that I still carry with me.  I lived on the Atlantic ocean for a year and was able to explore the Caribbean islands.  I snorkeled with some beautiful fish, ate some amazing food and rang in my 25th birthday in the middle of the ocean on a cruise ship.  I went to Key West and saw Hemingway's house, ate key lime pie and stood at the southernmost point in the United States.  I had an amazing trip with my mom to Disneyworld which is amazing as a kid but even better as an adult.  I lived 45 minutes from New York City and finally walked where my Great-Grandparents walked on Ellis Island when they came to this country.  I saw Philadelphia.  I have climbed two 14ers, ran countless half marathons, tent camped for the first time and fell in love. 

All of these have been some amazing experiences in my life and not a full list of them either! It would take forever to list them all.  But in all the places I have lived and all the experiences I have had, they happened for a reason.  Together, they made me the person I am today and brought me to the place I am now.  People have passed into my life and back out and the special few have stuck around.  I am thankful for those.  Those that have left my life have given me lessons that I have taken into the future and things that I just want to forget. 

Through all of this, I remember this from the bible:

Ecclesiastes 3

 

There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,

a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

a time to search and a time to give up,

a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,

a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,

a time for war and a time for peace.

 

This verse helps me remember there is a time and a reason for everything under the sun. I know that everything that I go through has a reason, good or bad.  I may not learn the lesson from it right away but it may pop up later in life on why I went through it.  So with this in mind I move forward into a place of goodness. 

 

There is a time for everything! <3

 

365 Days of Thanks...Day 39

Day 39: I am thankful for a sleeping mask. 

My love left me this morning and I had a little bit of a headache.  Thankfully, it wasn't migraine worthy but enough that light was bothering me.  I have four (yes four) sleeping masks in my bedside table and grabbed one and slept in a bit more.  It was nice to sleep in a bit but I would gladly trade them in for an awesome job!

A whole new year

I originally wrote this on the plane ride back from Wisconsin on January 2nd. 

Flying always makes me nervous.  I have never been one who has been happy to fly.  I don’t know if it is my fear of heights or the hoopla that we now have to go through to get on the plane but I am not a fan.  I usually have to have a glass of wine or some other form of alcohol to get through it.  This flight is a bit different. 

My love and I just spent six days in my home state with my family.  My parents let us crash at their home for a bit to spend some time with the family.  It was a hard trip since my family seems to get smaller all the time.  My grandfather, one of the men who fought in World War II, turned 92 last month.  He has been in and out of the hospital over 2012.  It was hard to see him get weaker and weaker over the year and it breaks my heart.  It was a hard trip home because I hate to say it, I fear it was the last time I would see him.  I don’t like to think like that but nobody lives forever.   It was good to see him and I am hoping we can see him again. 

2012 was a hard year and I was happy to say goodbye to it with my family. The year brought lots of ups and downs and what feels like more downs then ups.  Throughout events of 2012, I have realized those who truly love me, those who are there for me, and those that are so selfish that they only look out for themselves.  I have said goodbye to those who are selfish, to those who hurt me, to those who did me wrong.  I have embraced more those who love me and support me through everything and hold on to them tight, both physically and emotionally.  I am taking these people with me to 2013 and in hopes that it will be an amazing year.  I have decided to make some changes to the New Year and make sure I remember those who are there for me.

So looking ahead, I plan to make some changes and improve so many things in 2013

    My love

December 31^st, 2009 was the first night that I met him.  It was an amazing night and I knew he was going to special to me.  We have had some great amazing days but also some bad times but through it all we have stood by each other through it all.  I hope in 2013 our love gets stronger and our adventure becomes something that neither of us could ever imagine.

 

 

 

 

  My family

I have very close relationships with most members of my family.  My parents and my brother are three people that I don’t know what I would ever do without.  I have called them all crying and pissed off and in various other moods and they have always been there for me.  We are states apart but when we talk, it is like they are in the room with me.   Unfortunately, in 2012, I was only able to make it home once and I wish I could do it more. They come see me often but there is nothing like coming home to family.  They will always be there for me and I will always be there for them. 

Be daring in my career

Some not so nice things happened in 2012 in terms of my career.  I was treated badly and worse than I thought another human being could hurt another.  I am working on moving past that.  I have forgiven those who have hurt me and ask for the patience for the next step.  Until that next step, I want to do something daring.  I am working on a novel that I hope to get published.  I am painting and drawing again.  Perhaps I will start a custom card company.  Who knows!  I just don’t want to be afraid to take a chance. 

 

 

 

  Finally say goodbye to those extra pounds

I have always been a muscular girl.  I was an athlete in high school and could bench press a small human but as I have gotten older, I have been troubled with losing weight and keeping it off.  This year, I am going to make sure I lose it all and get in the best shape I can.  I am hoping to have a family one day and I want to make sure that nothing goes wrong.

       Just be me

I lost a lot of who I was in my former job.  It took quite some time but I was able find me again.  I vowed never to lose sight of myself again.  I don’t want to compromise myself for a job, a man or anyone else in my life.  God put me on this earth to be me and to love the me I am.  I am going to stick clear to that and learn to love me for me and kick those out of my life who try to change me.

  Be amazing

2013 is going to be an amazing year.  I have vowed to make this year have a different outcome then last year.  I want to do something amazing, be something amazing and just plain be amazing. J

365 Days of Thanks...Day 38

Day 38: I am thankful for my family.

My love and I just spent six days back in Wisconsin with my family.  I am always excited to see them and it is so hard to come back to Colorado.  I have a very small family and I make sure that I see as many of them as I can while I am home.  They are my greatest support and I don't know what I would do without them.